Anchors Aweigh: EX- Bonhomme Richard- C

Five hours Later
Bridge of the Bonhomme Richard

"Get your D#$% A$$ back To Your Mother F#$%ing Ship Colt," Andros mimicked Rufus Letch's Voice as he sat in his chair.. "Your are to get her up and Running.. I do not mean to put her F#$%ing on Top of a building.. Once She is up and running you have two weeks to get her to the Hawaii.. In Two months and Two weeks, the bonhomme Richard will be the bad guys and take on the Whole West Coast Fleet."

Master Chief Dimitrious looked at his Captain narrowing a blackened eye.. "He F#$%ing horsewhipped a four star as a Lt. Commander.. He is for all damn intents and purposes Commanding officer of SPAWAR.. You just told the Lt. Commander to F@#$ off... He had ordered you no bar Fights.."

"I told you it was a training Exercise. I did not burn down the bar either.. It was All Legal Like," Andros switched to his own voice.. "The only Naval Vessel I have ever served on was a Bertha Class ship.. She was named the Qapla.. I was her CO.." An Evil smile crossed Andros's face at the memory, "And she has not been built yet.. So.. Unless you have a time machine the only way.." Andros switched to Rufus's voice, "GET my A$$ back to my SHIP.." Andros was back in his own voice, ".. Is to build the old girl.. Out of the parts of the Bonhomme Richard."

A beautiful female's voice was nervous as she walked on the Bridge. With her Duffle bag over shoulder, "First Lt. Hatchett Reporting Sir.."

"At ease First Lt. Hatchett," Andros sharply ordered as he stood up.. "So your my new XO.. Your Aunt did not tell me you were so.. So Green.."
The First Lt.'s face turned red..

"Anyway boats.. This is what we will be doing," Andros watched as a mindless hispanic male ET3 bumped into the First Lt..
"I .." The ET3 freezes as he sees Andros Staring at him, "S#$%.."

Andros sees the Seeman shaking. Narrowing his eyes, "ET3 Walters.. F#$%.. JAG was supposed to call me when your damn dependapodimus filed for divorce.."
Walters looked down in tears shaking," Sir.. I.. I wont let you down this all I.."

"He took everything.. He moved in wit..Wi.. a woman," Walters was shaking..

"Xo the Bridge is yours," Andros put his arm around the ET3. "Lets go have a cigarette.."

ET3 was shaking as the XO was wide eyed, "Sir.."

"Your a F#$%ing officer now Hatchett.. Not my God D@#$ problem you were not able to meet my needs. Muster was 32 seconds before you made to the bridge.. Take command of the bridge, It would takes years of skill to F#$% up the Rusty Boner worse then it is.. " Andros walked to the Bridges exit, "Boats. Its a baby girl. Lets toss her in see if she can swim."

"Understood sir.. I will hold the late C#$%'s hand," Master chief gave a dirty look at the XO.. "Sit in the damn chair NOW!!!"

Andros had a smile on his face, "Now ET3 walter start from the begining.."

The new XO moved like she was still a cadet dropping her sea bag, "Master Chief I.."

Whapp..

"What the hell," Hatchett looks at Master Chief Dimitrious..

Whapp..

"Sir, first one is for dereliction of duty.. Even as chair force you should know that You are in charge of the D#$% bridge not me.. I do NOT tell you what to do.. You tell me.. I have known your aunt for years.. She never made this mistake.. Second," Master chief has an evil grin on his face. After the pause ends, "You will maintain decorum on your bridge. I am either Master Chief or Boats.. I am your COB.. XO. You will learn to add proper address at the end and beginning of the statement.. SIR!"

"What in sam hell do you mean by hitting me," First Lt. hatchett glares..

Whapp

"God Damn it Master Chief," First Lt. Hatchett growls.. "It is called F#$%ing consideration.." While the XO B#$%ed Master Chief hit a button, "I swear to god you F#$% with me again. I will gut you."

"Scuse me," A very pissed off voice growled.. "I will not be.."

"Who the ," A whapp interrupts the First Lt.. "I am just going to frakking kill you."

"Perhaps we should hear Admiral Killton of supply first first Lt. Hatchett," Master Chief grinned as The First Lt. Went wide eyed.." the Bonhomme richard has asked for a.."

"You dare threaten a four star Admiral.." Killton's voice rose," You will never.."

"Sir," first Lt. Hatchett is interrupted again..

WHAP!!

"F#$% you.. I do not give a S#$% that you know my Aunt.. Do this crap again and I will denut you myself.. " Hatchett stands up and yells," You will stop your stupid S#$% and do what you are told.. Or I will spread your God D#$% entrails over the decks of this ship for the God D#$% F#$% of it.."

Dimitrious grins," Understood sir.. If the Admiral Does not have our supplies here per his orders you will deal with him personally.." Boats turns towards the com and orders it cut..

"Master Chief," Hatchett covers her mouth and sinks down.. "Thats my F#$%ing career!"

"Congratulations Mam.." Dimitrious grins, "I think he got the message.." Bringing up a holofile, "You are in the Captains seat and will have to finish all the calls on hold and all of the paperwork.."

Hatchett sees the system pop up.. "Thirty one more calls to go.." She speed reads through the files.. "This is bullS#$%.. Why isnt this crap already here.. Master chief.."

Seeing the new XO trying to get him with an evil smile on her face, "Sir.. What are your orders?"

She reviews the Messages.. "I. I."

WHAP!!

"The Commanding officer of DoD supplies leads by example. They show no hesitation or pause when they give Orders.."

She Narrows her eyes and smiles as something dawns on her. In a sweet voice, "Its just so confusing.."

Master Chief goes to hit her in the back of the head only to end up on the deck in front of the XO.

"I think the Chief's mess will handle this administrative Bulls#$%.." She smiles down at the Master Chief, "You boys seem to have a LOT of free time.. So divide the calls up.. Leave Thirteen and.." She sees the number.. "I Will answer Twenty three.. Carry the F#$% on Master Chief.." After a short pause, " And Its mam to all of you.. God decided not waste material and give me a small penis like all of you.. I have brains.. Now Get the F#$% there.."

Master Chief stood up and smiled, "Yes.. Mam."

"Dimitrious.. Where is the Damn Third officer? Toss me my F#$%ing Sac." First Lt. Hatchett sat in the command chair feeling the sides of it, "Now let me see If I can figure out why in the hell you boys are stripping so much crap out." after a second, "What the hell.. My Device wont power up.."

"Yes Mam.. Finding the Third officer.. Delegating out the Answering now Mam," Master Chief sees a wide First Lt. Looking at him.. He Whispers where only she can hear, "No matter what. The crew cant see you shake on the inside, Ever. The shaking is natural.. Giving into the feeling is not. They have to know they can count on you at all times. They rely on your strength not mine. I see why Colt let himself get shanghied into taking you."

"My aunt is on 23. Master Chief, I am putting that off as long as possible. " She narrows her eyes when she see's the judgmental attitude in the Master Chiefs eyes, "I said I will call the bi#$% in a few minutes.. "

That day 1200

A lightly brown skinned man in a Commanders uniform walked up the plank.

ET3 Walters was on watch.. He had a rifle over his shoulder and a side arm, "You must be Commander Pul'Deox.. Welcome aboard.. Authorization ET3 Walters noting the third officer of the Rusty Boner is aboard.." A green light scanned the commander. Walters turned towards one of the Marines, "Private Take the Commanders Sea Bag. take it to his temp rack and lockit down. Sir The XO is on her period and wants your A$$ on the the D@mn Bridge right now!"

"Taking the Third Officers sea bag.. Secure it in his temporary rack.. Per the Watches instruction." The Private walked over, "Good luck sir. She is riding our Chief's A$$es because your F#$%ing late and the Captain is well.. Doing his own D@#$ thing.."

"This is not," Commander Pul'Deox froze when he noticed another marine with his rifle lowered.. "What do you think your.."

"New watch procedures Third Officer.. We do NOT salute while on watch and the Watch is authorized to shoot to kill." ET3 Walters rested his hand on his slung rifle, "The order came from the XO.. This way sir.."

ET3 Walters held his free hand indicating the Third Officer to walk.. As he walked past the temporary Quarter deck he noticed Snipers hiding.. "Snipers.."

Commander Pul'Deox watched a group of young sweating sailors running up and down the flight deck. One of the older Chief's had a cattle prod in his hand.. "F#$%ing P#$$$%!!!"

"Suckie watch," Walters seemed happy. He lead the Third Officer into the ship, "Just so you know sir.. This is not the Coast Guard or the PC Navy.. The Captain is a good man and a dick. The officers have a very high Standard.. Those are the officers who talked back to their chief's and have not yet caught on.. Its a new Navy!"

Commander Pul'Deox was wide eyed as he was absorbing the sights.. Men and women removing parts from the ship..

"Third Officer on the Bridge," ET3 Walters called out.

HAtchett yelled, "If your balls are that big then come down to the Rusty Boner Admiral.. I have F#$%ing orders from Admiral De'Chez, Vice Admiral MacCann, and F#$%ing Vice Admiral Vorley.." The XO cut the line, "Boats F#$5ing remind me to find out who the F#$% those men are.." She turns to the Third Officer.. " Welcome the F#$% aboard .. Now.. the Captain wants you down in engineering ASAP.."

"Your a First Lt.. USAF," Commander Pul'Deox growls.. "I out F#$%ing.."

Walters hits the Commander in the back of the head, "The XO is owed the respect of her title Commander.. Keep it up and the boat will roll.."

"ET3 Walters," Hatchett growled..

"Mam," ET3 Walter froze at the sound and tone of her voice.

"Next time he does that deck him.. Let Master Chief Dimitrious train him.." Hatchett went back to the Comline, "Now you D#$%less C#$%.. You either.."

"I do not have to take this," the man on the phone ffroze.

"That is my good friend Enrique. He is hung like a mule.. Now the Dependapotimus we were discussing.."

"We are Government employees.. You cant just send your Thugs into our office and give orders," The man on the phone had fear in his voice..

"Enrique Darling.. Toss him, the Dependapodimus, and his new girlfriend on a mac flight in chains.." She looks at boats..

"Vice Admiral MacCann.. Acting CO of West Pac ordered them brought back to the west coast for Child molestation charges.." Dimitrious grinned, " Anyone who tries to stop you.."

"You are some lying sacks of S#$%.." The mans voice is clear and distinct.. "Hatchett Darlin, you owe me a three night special for this.."

"You bring them to mama and I will give you a week.. Give Icer a hug for me," Hatchett gets off the com.. "Commander.. The Captain WANTS YOU IN ENGINEERING NOW!!!"

Commander Pul'Deox balls up his fst and stops when he notices two of the guards on the bridge..

Walters wwhispers "And the snipers.. Just say yes XO and I will walk you to the Engineering Department.."

Looking over at the Armed Watch the Commander," This damn boat is F#$%ed up three ways from sunday.. " He eyes the XO, "Permission to carry on XO.."

"Good luck.. The Captain is very pissy right now.. Better you then F#$%ing me," The Master Chief responded.. "Get the F#$% to engineering.. Walters.. Do NOT hang around down their.. Run for it.."
____________________________________________



Engineering

Andros sings an old song in a language the Commander doesnt recognize.. After a few moments, "Old Girl.. I have to strip you down for parts. In the future you go down defending Pendleton.. Your Captain went down with you as his XO left with the surviving members of the crew. You have my word, together if the Chinese hit this time, I will be at your new conn. We will pound the damn bastards to pieces."

The Solemnity of the moment makes the Commander pause.. "Sir," respect oddly enough comes from Pul'Deox's lips. "that language I dont recognize.."

"If it aint the Dick head Admiral old girl.. I got work to do to get your new party dress and switch blades ready," Andros rubs the hull.. "Commander Gilbert Forsen Pul'Deox.. Born in the backwoods of Alabama. Served without distinction to date.. "

The Commander balls up his fist, "I do not like the fact I got pulled off the Admirals staff.. I earned that assignment.. I reported the first day and the next day I get orders.. Some crap about the Admiral Gambled me away to some damn kid .."

The Commander goes down hard, "Lets get something straight.." Andros is standing over the Commander, "You could be a good officer.. However you where about to fall under the influence of a bad one..You stupid sunab#$%^.. Tomorrow you would do something that cost you your soul.. "

"What are you F#$%ing talking about," The Commander spits out a tooth. "That future crap you claim.. Its BullS#$%.."

As his boots connect tp ribs, "Lance Corporal Franks paperwork was on your desk. You were going to bury her rape case. You get away with it till.. Well the whole marine Corps gets NJP'd for leaving a marine behind. Your body is found in back alley behind a bar frequented by Marines." Andros stands over Pul'Deox, "I am going to leave you alone with your thoughts.."

"How in the hell do you," The Commander is wide eyed as he feels his ribs.. "I was just asked to sign off on it.. The reports indicate that she is an easy.." The Commander pauses at the statement.

"You are going to make a choice today.. You have the papers.. " Andros stood over the Commander, "I am ordering you to send the papers.. What you send is up to you.. Look around and think real damn hard.. A second chance to restart your career.. It is not going to be easy.. I offer you the hard road, pain, suffering, and promotion shut out. The only advantage you will have when you get up in the morning.. Your self respect will say good morning Commander.."

"What if I send it as is," Commander Pol'Deox is in shock from the pain in his side..

"Talk to this dick head then make your D@#$ choice," Andros tosses a card. "Choose wisely Commander.. The only easy day was yesterday.."

The Commander tries to stand up and realizes his ribs are broken.. He sits there and picks up the card, "James Bach Congressional aide to.."

December 23, 2024
0715 Deck of the Bonhomme Richard

"What.. Nevermind.." Hatchett shook her head, "So this is where our thieves disappeared to.."

Three semi trucks had pulled into the docks followed by base security..

Admiral Beauregard whispered to the XO..

"Marines, security detail.. Cover our men till I figure out what is going on.. Pul'Deox.. You seeing this," Hatchett spoke clearly..

"Yes Mam.. Cover our men till mor info is present." The Commander pauses, "Security Detail Fire if any non member or guest of the bonhomme richard get with in ten feet of our TS shipments."

The Admiral in a SEAL Uniform gave the thumbs up to the Bridge.. He motioned for the SEALs with him to walk.. "You stay up her darling," Admiral Beaureguard whispered. "No matter what happens your in charge.. Take no S#$% off of any of them.. Then blame Andros because it was PER HIS ORDERS.."

Hatchett smiled as she watched the SEALs and Admiral go only half way down..

One of the base MA's tried to get close to the Trucks.. Multiple shots rang out from the Bonhomme Richard.. Freezing the MAs.

"Now.." Admiral Beauregard orders in the pause. His SEALs take up position around the Trucks using them for cover. Walking slowly, "Hold your fire.. This is TS and above Level Equipment.. " Opening one of the backs of the semi trucks the Admiral went wide eyed and slammed doors. "I want an extended perimeter of two hundred feet from the exterior edge of those buildings.."

His SEAL's look at the admiral with a curious look..

"Captain.. Go with the MA's and direct them on the perimeter.. I want either the crew of the Bonhomme Richard or TS level Clearance eyes only.. With Lt. Commander's Letch's approval.." He pauses, "I do not know how the bastards did it Lovelace but it's the crap from the DARPA drawing boards."

"F#$%.. Those.. God D#$% Colt," Lovelace growled as he authoritatively walked over to the MA Officer. "That bastard's number will come up.."

As Lovelace BullS#$%'s the Master at Arms, Admiral Beauregard whispers to the drivers. "Get a tarp from somewhere and get this S#$% secured on the Bonhomme Richard.. This is beyond what your Captain has even an inkling of Authority.."

A three star Admiral walks around the building shaking his head, "God D#$% it Letch.. Quit F#$%ing telling me this is my problem.. I did NOT train.." A loud response makes the three star stop and count to ten.. "Understood sir.. These supplies are supposed to be here.. It was just creative shipping solution.. I will have a talk with MY Captain on proper procedure of supply.. The equipment is here.." After a slight pause, "What the hell do you mean one of your Professors from the Institute is on their way.."

"Vice Admiral MacCann," Admiral Beauregard shakes his head.. "The F#$5ing LT Commander needs to send the.."

"I will send the paperwork myself and deal with San Diego PD.. Yes I understand Captain Colt has today off.." After MacCann pauses, "Per his contract with the NAtional Guard.. And.. The Big boss gave him the day off every year on this day.. Sir I am here per your orders.. Just to meet my Sea Baby commander Pul'Deox."

Every one is quiet as Vice Admiral MacCann peaks in the back of the Semi..

"God D@#$.. The prototypes.. Less then three days in charge and he is robbing the fleet blind.." Vice Admiral MacCann has smile, "Maybe I did train him.."

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



Bridge of the Bonhomme Richard
1300

"Mam.." hatchett takes a deep breath, "I have not seen.."

"Listen Damn it.. Andros cant just come beat the S@#$ out of my boy friend.. Me and him argue and now he kicked me out," The womans voice cracked.. "Andros put him in the hospital.. I am at.."

"Who in the hell is this woman," Hatchett had a look one her face.. "It was on the Captains line and came right through as.."

"Yes.. I need a ride to the Bonhomme Richard.." The womans voice responded, "Uhm.. Yes I am Lt. Colts.. Significant other.."

"Mam.. " Dimitrious's voice came through, "He does not.. F#$%tard Da#$ation.. The Blonde.. Yes Mam.. "

"Master Chief.. Thank.." Hatchett pauses, " The Blonde.."

"Mrs. Parker I have to let you know he has the day off.." Master Chief Dimitrious's voice comes through, "It is a pleasure to meet you.. Mrs. Smithson told me about you is it.."

"Gretchen talks to much sometimes.. When the hell is little man supposed to .. Lt. Colt supposed to be here.." Austin Sighs, "Long sea tale.. Little man and me need to talk.."

"Mrs. Parker.. I will take you to the boat per your request immediately.." The sound of a car door opens, "Mam..I  do have to wait on another passenger from the Tucson Airport.. Then we can all three.."

"Mrs. Parker.. Boats will take care of you.." Hatchette cuts the line, "What the F#$% ?"

Admiral Beauregard closes his eyes again and props his feet up and one of the conns as he sleeps in the Captains Chair, " Always rest, S#$%, and eat when you get the chance little lady.. Especially now.."

"And up on deck next," Hatchett growls as she is left standing because of the Admiral..

ET3 Walters turns towards the XO.. "Uhm mam.. Your gonna want to hear this..."

"..ng hell are you pilot? this is your last warning.. ID your self or the Air defense net will down you.. "

"Got to catch me first," Andros Colt's voice came over the com.. "Need some flying music.." The sounds of electric Guitar come over the air... A few seconds later, "God D@#$ it MIRMAR.. This is Lt. Commander Refus Letch.. Why in God D@#n sam F#$%ing hell is my mother F#$%ing Marine Corp Air not flying.. I sent you the God D@#$ orders.. F#$% you General Winston.. Brigadier General Golen.. You are to immediately relieve General Winston.." All in Rufus Letch's voice..

A male voice came over the line, "Thats cute Mr. Colt but I am quite aware of.."

The sounds of electronic beeping came through..

"Sir.. It is his command code for today," A nameless voice was shocked..

Admiral Beauregard takes a deep breath and stands up as the Brigadier General is silent.. "Pardon me Baby girl.." The old Admiral walks over to the com and activates it, "Captain Colt.. This is Admiral Beauregard.. Hatchett is clearing the deck now.. Hang on and get the package here at all cost.. Let Lt. Commander Letch handle the politics.. I am sending my command codes from the Rusty Boner and assuming command of package delivery. "

Hatchett narrows her eyes and starts barking orders.. ".. Cleared NOW!!!"

The Brigadier General Comes back on the Line, "This is not a drill.. S#$%.. Get those air wings in the damn air Marines now! Provide cover for the F#$%ing Lt... Admiral Beauregard.. I know that this is all.."

"Lt. Commander Letch is listening and your career depends on the speed of your response.." Admiral Beauregard evilly smiles, "Hatchett darling.. Make sure you have that air force magic produce my paperwork for me.. Coronado is billing SPAWAR for my services today."

"Do your own damn paperwork if we are getting billed for this," Hatchett growls.. "You sack of s#$%s planned this.."

"Coming your way with a S#$% ton of drones Brigadier General Golen.. Please do not deploy emp counter measures.. This piece of S#$% I am Flying will go boom," Andros responds..

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________



Two hours Later
Deck of the Bonhomme Richard

Andros Colt was wearing a form of full black body armor starring out as Vice Admiral MacCann was counting to ten holding his hurt hand.

"Colt.. " MacCann was trying to calm down, "Letch told me this crap is all stunts I have performed.. Take off your Damn helmet Captain.. I mean.. "

"Removing helmet sir," Andros waited as the seams disengaged. "Please note for the Record per my contract with the DoD I am off today.. " Removing the helmet, "I am off today. Out of respect for you sir is the only reason I am standing here."

"Andros Nicodemus Colt," Austin storms past the guard..

"Little lady," Vice Admiral MacCann is interrupted as Austin slaps Andros.. "Carry on.."

"How dare you? You had no right Little man.. He was a good man.."

"Then why did he hit you baby girl, " Andros was cold bloodied.

"I have told you.. What happened when we were kids.." Austin is very frustrated, "You turned Sandra and Gretchen against me.. My mother is bat S@#$ insane and my sister believe all your.."

Andros hugs Austin, "I still love you.."

"Stop it," Austin is in tears.. "Just.."

Austin melts in Andros's arms for comfort..

"They do not hate you.. They love you and are worried about you," Andros held Austin. "Your boyfriend will live, I think.. However he is facing charges for assaulting an officer.. He will be transfered out here for his NJP.. I can not undo that.."

Austin just cries.. After a moment, "Its just.. You were so young and.."

"Lets not talk here baby girl," Andros tosses the Helmet to Vice Admiral MacCann.. "Lt. Commander Letch is on his way.. He will know what systems he wants.." Andros whispers something else to the Vice Admiral.."

"Your S#$%^ing me.. Stolen from SPAWAR.." Vice Admiral MacCann got real pissed, "I.. S#$%.."

"Relax MacCann.. Rufus is having the man who stole the designs transferred to," Andros paused as the man standing next to Chief was very green in the face.." I think he has already been delivered.."

"Regardless of your contract Andros," MacCann took a deep breath. "Would you please secure the plane and the parts the Liason officer will want.. I have no damn clue.."

Andros kisses Austin on the Forehead, "Master Chief.."

Dimitrious Steps forward, "I will give her a full tour sir.." Dimitrious walks over to Austin and takes her arm.. "My wife would love to meet you.. Thank you for babysitting our two hellions till Gretchen brought them to our little world.."

"Go with him baby girl.. MacCann doesnt say please," Andros turned around.. "Bring me some of the torches and take that SOB just standing their to the brig.."
_________________________________________________________________

BAQ officers region (lol)



ET3 Walters set A high calorie breakfast on the Table, "I am learning to cook.. So forgive.." ET3 was wearing an Apron that read, Keep F#$%ing with me.. I'm gay and you have a purty mouth..

Austin yawned wearing just a T-Shirt and Panties.. She went wide eyed and covered up, "Diana you could have warned me.."

"You two are such bad girls," ET3 grinned. "Have a seat and let me know how these taste.. I have to pass my chef quals.."

Diana yawned in a different old shirt of Andros's, "Austin.." She bit into the pancakes, "My god this is good.."

"Real sweet tea to," ET3 Walters grinned as he sat a plate on the table. "Plus," Walters had a conspiracy tone in his voice. "Master Chief, The Xo, and 3rd want any insight I can get.. You two tramps got me out of duty today. So spill the beans.."

Austin realizes she is hungry as the smell of the food reaches her, "Andros left you recipies.." She see's her eggs in the toast next to A half glass of milk and a half glass of OJ.

Diana yawns not meaning, " Neither of us got any sleep walters. You will find MY little man can go about a week without sleep before it catches up with him."

Austin sips the milk as she slowly sits down, "My little man has been like that since.." austin blushes, "He does sleep.. Did he ever sleep in your arms?"

"No.. I always woke up in his.." Diana narrows her eyes at Austin, "Walters I apologize.. We will have this argument for a long time.."

"Well.. You both need deodorant," ET3 laughs evilly.. "the whole room smells like sex.. It took me five minutes to clear out the smell.. So Captain Colt does not sleep.."

"Regina shoved it in my face he did sleep in her arms," austin yawns again as she picks up her fork.

"Regina De'Chez," Waters is wide eyed..

"She left out you were here Austin.. She is being a B#$%^ again," Diana responded.. Absent minded she turns on the news..

"..shooting at 32nd street Naval base.. We are live with.." the Reporter pauses in shock as she sees a man with a rope around his neck, "They are about to hang that man.."

Andros Colt is on the screen as the Camera man zooms in, ".. against the US Navy, the US Government, her people, and your own peoples F#$%ing laws.." Andros is seen kicking the bucket out from under the shaved mans head..

As the hung man slowly dies, "This is barbaric.. They cant just.."

A car detonates in the distance making the camera crew jump in fear..

A private laughs and motions to the crew, "Yall are safe.. The DoD is on watch mam.. Her Marine Corps and Navy are here.." The pride in the Private's voice shines through.. "Come on aboard.."

The Camera zooms around as they walk, "My god they are hanging more men.. This is not happening.."

Andros's voice shines through, "Relax.. Those men you see are already dead.. They are just serving the second part of their sentence.. They were already shot dead by US Marine Snipers.."

"This .. this, "The Reporter is stunned..

"They were going to park the car next to the day care facility on base mam. On christmas eve at that." Andros has a command look on his face, "Unfortunately for them the DoD was on watch.. We are the best of the best.. the Car was just EOD testing a new procedure post scan for bio chemicals.."

"New Procedure," The Reporter saw the man being hung on the Bonhomme Richard with part of his head missing. She pukes and gets a disgusted look on her face..

"Oh grow up mam.. These men meant harm to DoD personel and their families.." Andros looked straight into the Camera, "I misse dbreakfast because of them.. And it was the start of one hell of a sea tale.. "

"You are a monster," The reporter growled. "This is inhumane.."

"The new UCMJ of SPAWAR authorizes this. We are playing a new round of cowboy and terrorist.. Take heed.. " Andros looks over his crew, "These men did a lot more then just what you saw planned.. We knew they were coming.. they were watched the whole time.. At any time they could have walked.. Not to mention where in hell do you lady get off with that attitude? Oh, your one of the progressives that support the troops but f#$% us in the A$$ first chance you get..."

Austin is green faced, "Thats.."

ET3 takes out his side arm and double checks everything, "That sneaky bastard.. this crap is a watch.. "

Diana stood up and closed her eyes as she reached the holoscreen, "Is this the part of your soul you kept from us.. The darkness from Camp Pendelton.. What did they do to you my little man.."

Diana had tears in her eyes as Austin stood up. She walked over to her sister and hugged her.. "I feel it too.."

"He loves you with all his heart Austin.. Why dont you just stay with us.. Please," Diana pleads with her sister. "I can stay.."

"No sis.. You are the fifth brightest person on the planet.. Do not do what I," austin is in tears as Diana storms out of the kitchen..

"Pendelton," Walters is confused..

"Little man thinks he commanded troops in the future.. It was a slaughter he survived.. Every so often I can feel it when we make love," Austin has tears in her eyes. "In those moments I can feel my sisters soul on him.. I cant explain it.. It might as well be real.. Let me go calm Diana down.. Can you keep the food warm for me?" She pauses, "You think this is messed up.. Wait to you meet Diana's best friend who thinks I am her mother and Diana is her auntie.." Sighing, "Or my F#$%ing mother.."

"No longer will we the proud members of the DoD, tolerate this bulls$%^. You dont want to see your people hung, dont let your mouth write check your A## cant cash. You want to play for blood. " Andros looks over at the shave man hanging as his bowels loose themselve, "We'll be your huckleberry."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Diana held Andros as he cried.. "Its ok baby she needs more time. To many blows and yall have coddled her."

"I am just F#$%ing up your life," andros sucked it up.. "And then their is JEssica.."

Diana sighed, "Stacy Colt.. Your and Austin's daughter. F#$%ing time travel. I forgave her.." Diana smiled, "I have a partial time share on your heart, but sis is the main lease holder.. Give it time.. She will come home to us.."

"Wait.. What else did .. You know about," Andros sighs. "Of course you do.. Soul Speak gave me away.."

"It appears our boys will be just like you. Stubborn and completely bullheaded," Diana kisses Andros.. "Till then I want to get my degree.." She hands Andros a zip drive, "This is the last part of what your doing.."

Andros looked at her..

"Ginny said hello.. Mrs. Sholoch is doing great with Ira.. The man desk now." Diana grins, "You left your pad open.. So I contacted them over some other matters.. Issiac did the work himself.."

"I locked my pad.." Andros laughs, " You know all my passcodes.. F#$%.."

Diana thinks for a second, "Thats right lover boy.. All your secret's belong are us." She giggles, "Your crew needs you Andros.. By the way.. Issiac had to call Cohen and Cruz for a double check.."

"this solution works.." Andros narrows his eyes, "Your learning to hide things Diana.. The problem is I know you had Issiac check your work.."

"I am sooo bored at MIT ok," Diana hits Andros in the arm.. "I need the brain exercise.. And Ginny did say they would send you a priest whose personality matches the needs of the crew.."

"So the old bastard agreed to the request," Andros paused.. "I guess we can find something else to do while we wait.."

"Andros Nicodemus Colt.." Diana crinkles her nose, "I am a lady.. Before your get started.. My mama called.."

"My little hellion," Andros grinned..

"Yes the insane woman that inhabits my poor mothers body," Diana shook her head. "She still hates me.." Diana holds up her hand, "I know baby.. I hurt you and pissed her off.. She is trying to make things right.. Ltch has her doing somethings she wont talk about.. You boys left her alive.. I still cant believe that.."

"She was following very dirty orders.. Legitimate ones too," Andros shakes his head.. "I will have to call her back.."

___________________________________________________________________________________________




Two Months later
32nd San Diego

"Stacy," Letch growled as he looked at the empty Bonhomme Richard.. 

One of the Marines standing between Letch and the Admirals from norfolk giggled, "Your the Fleet Admiral uncle Rufus.. " She looks at the empty ship, "Dad you are in so much S#$%.."

The four star looked at Letch, "You are obviously not a very good officer.. You do not even know where your 'Captain' is at.." The four star Admiral snickered, "For so great a time traveling Captain.. He left his boat unguarded.."

"Admiral Stone," Stacy pulled a knife from her much more advanced body armor. "Permission to gut him Admiral.."

"Not yet Major Colt," Letch got in Stones face.. "Yes to answer your question.. Jessica is one of my chronal Marines.. She is the daughter of the recruit ranked Captain of the rusty boner.. I would Advise you not to insult her father.. The Colts have temper issues.. As for the Rusty boner.." Letch rips the four stars off of Admiral Stone.. He throws them at the Bonhomme Richard..

"I will have you," Admiral Stone stops in midsentence. His four stars go through the Rusty Boner and splash into the water.. "What.. A holographic system.."

Letch taps a com badge, "SPAWAR.. Where is the Rusty boner.."

"The Bonhomme Richard sir.." A computerized voice responds, "Which one Admiral.. "

Letch looks at Major Colt, "Lange.."

"Caught that sir," Stacy Colt responded..

"SPAWAR.. " Letch pauses as he thinks, "What is the most Recent Bonhomme Richard?"

"Admiral Letch.. The USS Bonhomme Richard dash C launched Yesterday under orders from Captain Colt," The SPAWAR Computer responded.. 

"that SOB," Letch pauses.. "Connect me to Captain Colt, now SPAWAR.."

A yawn came over the com, "Morning Rufus.. "

"What in sam hell do you think your doing Recruit," Letch growls..

"Following a Seaman Letch's orders SIR.." Andros spoke in Letch's voice..

"Where are you," Letch counted to ten in his head..

"On the Bridge of the Rusty Boner sir," Andros responds in his own voice.

"I gave you very specific orders," Letch pauses as something dawns on him.. He looks at the buildings blocked off.. You F#$%ing bastard.. You beautiful F#$%ing bastard.."

Master Chief is heard, ".. reports we are 90% loaded.. In Twney minutes we will all the ammo we need.."

"By the way sir.. You should be getting a communique from an officer complaining I have wiped out all the ammo you just resupplied.."

"I told you to get your A$$ back to your ship," Letch thinks for a second.. "SPAWAR bring up a the images from Lunar one.."

"Unable to comply sir.. " SPAWAR pauses for a moment, "Not all Those present have the prerequisite security clearance sir.."

"Screw it bring up the file.." Letch waits as the Computer follows orders.. A hologram appears of the Rusty Boner.. "I want non holographic overlay.." When the hologram pops up, "That Son of a B#$%^.."

"Dad did that," Stacy slash Jessica  looks at the Admiral and narrows her eyes. "Right sir.. Cruz is to busy.."

"What did you do with our ship Letch," Admiral Stone growls..

"Captain Colt," Letch calls out. "All stop.."

Andros relays the order to his crew.. "Were busted Master Chief.. austin left again any way.. Make sure the brig has the new matresses and soft pillows.."

"Command override do not leave the Armory.. Standby for inspection," Letch Grins evilly.. He looks over at the buildings in the marked off area, "Stacy darling have those building secured 24 / 7.. Those would have been the machine shops.."

_____________________________________________________________________________________



Admiral Stone glared at Letch, "He destroyed a billion dollars worth of equipment Letch.. All those planes and the Bonhomme Richard are gone and I have this ugly Piece of S#$%..Their is still an argument going on over your Command of the West Coast.. It isnt permanent Rufus."

Letch was starry eyed as he walked up to Parked ship.. With tears in his eyes he hugged it, "Dont listen to him old girl.. " Letch got a look on his face, "Major.. Confirm what the hull is made of.."

Stacy walks over and touches the hull with her armored hand, "What the F#$%.. Its.. What the hell Dad?"

"I followed orders.. When I left the Old Bertha class USS Qapla was being used as a test bed.. So me and Fred cooked up the material to the best of our ability.." Andros Colt was wearing a SPAWAR Captains body armor.. "Admiral Per your orders.. I have taken my A$$ and returned to my F#$%ing ship.. We have to report to Hawaii."

"where is my ship," Admiral Stone was pissed off.

"We gutted and stripped A SPAWAR ship Dickhead," Master Chief Dimitrious grinned with pride. "She can do 33 knots top speed.. She is armed to the teeth Stone.. See you and the fleet at the war games.. On behalf of the Chiefs mess we are so gonna F#$% you."

"I will have you drawn up on charges again, Chief.." Admiral Stone goes down from Andros hitting him..

"It is time we introduce the Fleet boys to our way of doin bi'ness."Andros stands over the Admiral, "Quit being a pu$$^ Admiral.. tis only a flesh wound.. Your getting your pretty uniform dirty on the ground. all those worthless lies you called medals wont help you beat me."

"And Halt Captain," Letch stands next to the Armored Andros.. "Admiral Stone I have never liked you.. If you are unable to participate in the war game with draw.."

the other Admirals and Generals who had joined them at the Armory started talking..

Stacy walked over to Andros.. "Dad. Are you Ok?" Stacy looks at The armored Captain.. "I heard Mama and Aunt Diana .."

"We will talk later babygirl," andros responds on suit to suit..

A hologram Appears, "This better be F#$5ing worth it Letch I told you that.." The old man in fishing gear was very unhappy, "What the Hell is that.." The hologram looks over at the Armored crew..

Master Chief Dimitrious growls.. "Admiral on Deck.." Every member of the Bonhomme Richard comes to attention minus the watch..

"Dimitrious you old bastard.." The Hologram walks over to the ship.. "What the.." The Hologram turns towards Captain Colt.." Captain Colt.."

"Hey Regina.. Diana said high," Andros speaks from his armor.. "Old Lady I know you are there.. "

"I still want him shot Letch," The old Admiral Growled..

"Oh phillip.. Be quiet," Regina answers over the holgram.. "I is my second favorite husband doing.. You have gotten so big Littleman.."

"Nana Macer," Stacy responds.. "I mean nana De'Chez.."

"Phillip.. Captain Colt can always be relieved of command of the Bonhomme Richard and sent home.. Thats two hours away right deary," Regina grins with a very evil smile..

"Letch.. " Admiral De'Chez pauses again, "Overview for an old idiot.."

"Admiral De'Chez.. I give you the USS bonhomme Richard dash C.. Bertha Class," Letch goes through the basics.. After a few minutes, " To sum it up she is the NAvy's version of the Air forces A-10, the Army's m1Abrhams, or the MArine corps osprey.. She is an ugly girl but she is a C#$% of the sea.. She fights and can take a pounding.."

De'Chez whistles when he reads the file, "He built this in under two months.. " After a few seconds, "My god the Bertha class holds this much F#$%ing ammo.. Thats your full budget for the whole fleet Letch.."

Letch laughs, "Let me steal the horses sir.."

"Captain Colt.." Admiral De'Chez "You beautiful Son of A Bitch.. Are those green half globes what this report says.. That many F#$%ing Drones.." The hologram is moving files, "Regina darling remind me to post pone having andros shot till sometime tomorrow.."

"Yes husband number one.. "Regina giggles at her own statement., "Keep in mind he does get a last request Husband."

Admiral De'Chez takes a deep breath, "This is.. My god.. Letch I can see I made the right call on you.. This armor on the Bertha class."

"I need your actual personal Signature.. Cosmic need to know.. Restricted to the construction crew and her command," Letch grins evilly.. "It gives us what we need decades earlier.."

One of the old Air Force Generals walks over and brings up his own files, "Relax Letch I am just making some assumed judgements.. The Bonhomme Richards size and space allows for more storage.. I am guessing her extra space is used for drones.." Sighing, "It means our planes and the new upgrades just became worthless.. Hatchett warned me.. Told me you were an A$$hole letch.. Please tell me.."

"I am upgrading MY west coast fleets with similar designs.." Letch Responded, "Plus I have her niece as the XO.. First Lt. Hatchett.." Letch Grins, "General Towler is here.."

A voice comes out over the air, "Uncle Towler.. You got dragged down here for this.."

"You are directly ordered not to discuss the with anyone outside your chain of command to include passing any form of communication.." Letch clearly orders..

"Do not get your Feathers ruffled Letch," Towler grins.. "Skunk works and a few others have put together part of what you boys have been pulling. We are not stupid.. You are an old hand at this.." Towler glared back at the other Officers, " You are stupid if you think Captain Colt did this without Lt. Commander Letch having any clue.. "

Letch grins evilly, "I officially had nothing to do with this.. I will gladly take the blame.."

One of the Coast guard Admirals walked over to the hull of the Rusty Boner, "You did this in two months Captain Colt?"

Yes Sir.. From stripping to parts aquisition," Andros responded respectfully..

"With a crew that had no experience with the Technology.. No presets, all bad boys from the Brig, and what appears to be a loose command structure," The Coast Guard Admiral shook his head. "Lt. Commander I have seen all I need to.. On behalf of the Coast Guard.. We accept SPAWAR's offer.. Good day gentlemen.."

Admiral Stone having stood up angrily ask, "What do you mean SPAWAR's offer.." Seeing the Coast Guard Admiral not respond, "Oscar.."

"Stone.." the Coast Guard Admiral stops cold, "Your not on the need to know.. Suffice it to say we have agreed to joint operations that allow us to operate separately from the idiots in the DoHS.. The Coast can in Functionality return to not being someone else's B$%^&. Lt. Commande rletch's other friend is quiet persuasive.. And then One of his Captains delivered this.. Even if SPAWAR only delivers on half, after cost.. The US Coast Guard will be three times better off.."

______________________________________________________________

Washington DC
White house
Office of the Secretary of Defense

The Commandant was not sober as two smiling Marines on the Presidents Detail were singing with him holding him up..

"It goes.. " the Commandant was singing the future version of the Hymn, "From the Streets of Moscow, to the Shores of Hong Kong.." The Marines in the white house were singing off key when the Secretary of Defense entered very pissed off.

"General," The Sec Def was followed in by the Female CNO. "That song is not very PC.. We frown on it here in polite society.."

Sporting her black eye, "I want him relieved of duty.. He is drunk on duty.."

The Commandant snickers, "John.. Ten bucks says she like anal.. God.. I must be drunk with beer goggles on, she looks doable.."

One of the Colonel staff members with dark shades on, "Sir.. I am still drunker then you.. And no she looks like a wookie to me.. I will wager money part of this DC paper pushing fleet has plowed her back forty.."

The CNO got a very angry look on her face, "I Will have your.."

The four Star Admiral went down from the Female Colonel's fist to her gut.

"I got the middle one sir," The Female Colonel with tan skin took off her rank.. As she tossed her rank on the Admiral, she stumbled over to the Commandant. After she kissed him, "Sir.. I F#$%ing resign.. Lt. commander Letch has offered me a GS security position with SPAWAR.. " She gropes the Commandant, "You will report to my bedroom again Sir."

"Let me get fired first and I will do the Marine Corps proud again," the Commandant grabs the Colonels butt and squeezes.

The marines in the room were all wide eyed as the Sec Def put his hand in his head..

"I got you commandant.. Thats," one of the male Marines kicked the down CNO..

"Navy filed a report of buildings rolling sir," The Sargent grinned..

"ENOUGH," The Sec Def had his face bright red.. "Get up Hellen.. NOW.."

"Sir," The CNO was very pissed off.. "This whole situation is very wrong.. I am ordering the arrest of.."

"Shut the F#$% up HeLlen," The Sec Def growled.. "Commandant.. The President had signed your firing with loss of benefits.." The Sec Def held up his hand as the marines all looked at him with ill intent, "Then the God D@#$ phone calls started coming in.. Representatives, Senators, Governors," The sec def took a deep breath.. "The President is still on the phone with some very powerful people getting his A$$ reamed like he is a toddler.. Hellen he has been told to choose.. "

"What.. I am being relieved of duty," The CNO was very pissed.. "they are the ones who are acting like barbarians in ur civilized military."

"He was told to choose between him being president or you being CNO.. It would be effective immediately.." the Sec Def looks at her wide eyed, "Due to personal financial irresponsibility.. "

"This is because I wont sleep with you anymore John, " Helen growls..

"Nice try C#$%," The Sec Def answers.. "You see I got a phone call or two myself.. A very drunk young man called me last night.. The one civilian horsewhipped."

"F#$%ing Civy," The Commandant growled.. "Little F#$%er can drink like a fish.. "

"Mrs. Macer does taste like sweetness," The still half drunk Colonel responds. "If we do not leave soon love I will have to see the full course.."

"Told me Hellen your involved with several of your Admirals and Captains.." The Sec Def was very pissed off, "That a$$hole Icer delivered me some of the video's this morning Helen.. Call me on it and Letch wins.. The President will be forced to relieve the majority of our trusted men.."

"Wait.. this means.." The commandant straightened up, "You cant F#$%ing relieve me.. I like that little A$$hole."

A tall mean looking black woman walked in, "No sir.. In fact you have duties you must attend to.. These cock suckers can sort out who they are gonna suck and F#$% without the Corps help.."

Lt. Colonel Green," the Sec Def took a deep breath.. "It is quiet rude to.."

"Any f#$%ing Way.." Greene turned her back on the men in the room, "Commandant, Alexander Delano Macer wishes to thank you for a pleasant evening. He sends his Commandant a gift he requested you were with pride.. Corporal Franks Lance corporal's pin.."

The Commandant comes to attention and takes off his for stars.. He breaks off one of the Stars, "Make a note Shania Green.. The Commandant of the USMC will forever wear the Lance Corporal's pin in place of one of his stars.. All Commandants will start their Career as a commandant with a singular NJP offense. Out of uniform, and will be ordered by a fellow officer to wear the pin as their punishment."

"Aye sir.. " Lt. Colonel Green answers as she steps back, "I have been assigned to your staff sir.. Alex said you might need an old hand at this game.. With your colonel's resignation.."

The Sec Def Glared at Lt. colonel Green, "You.. I do not like.. " After a deep breath, "Helen.. I manage to convince Mr. Macer to give you a fighting chance.. If the East Coast Fleet can defeat the Bonhomme Richard at this war game.. No resignations.."

The CNO stood up and glared at the drunk Commandant, "We will destroy the Bonhomme Richard.."

"Their is a catch.. You lose we all go to the brig," the Sec Def had a very pissed off look on his face. "Macer is playing for blood.. The President Agreed to the terms.. He knows you will find a way to win.." The Sec Def looks at the CNO..

"I knew I could count on the only real man in the white house," The CNO turned around and saw a very angry first lady.. "Mam."

The first Lady pounced on the CNO and was drawing blood, "You f#$%ing little cunt.. " The colonel with Greene's help grabbed the first Lady very gently and quickly, "Capatain Colt just sent me the photo's of you and my husband.. with the F#$%ing Video.. You and your people are gone.. You hear me, gone."

"Mr. Sec Def.. First blood looks like it goes to Captain Colt and the Bonhomme Richard," The Commandant grins evilly.

"Shut the F#$% up Commandant," The Sec Def growls very pissed off as the First Lady yells she will see her transferred to the west Coast Navy..

"That F#$%ing SOB," the Sec Def Growls as his phone Rings.. He answers it, "No sir..Mr. President, Mr. colt sent the proof to the first Lady.." Everyone hears a S#$% come from the phone, "Sir.. I warned you he was a reporter.. I will see what intel can dig up for us.." After a few seconds, "Icer is in the Oval office.. I am on my way.."


________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



Honored Grandmaster,

I apologize for this slow response in my reports.. Captain Colt is as stubborn as his psych report indicates, with a complete disregard for authority. I am not allowed, like a common crew member, to use any of my devices. I am forced to use pencil and paper to write a letter home. (this is my eleventh attempt) Pencil.. AGH.. I sit as mere Chaplin on the most advanced battleship in the world (I cant delete or check my work electronically) using a communication method so primitive I gawk at it..

I told him he knows us and our lack of families.. He told me to hand write my Reports to my Sea Daddy Robert A Heinlein.. I am now in charge of the whole ships spiritual well being. That ensuring everyone has someone to write to is now my Job for being late.. (Sir.. If it is ok with you, May I write you per my orders. It would be an honor.)

All Colt said was his pound of flesh from the C.O.S. would be so fun to extract. I had had enough and called the Captain out.. He let me use my devices.. Next thing I know I wake up in the infirmary with the Weapons officer shaking his head. Major Smith (I think the Captain choose him to screw with me.. Smith really Honored sir..) told me welcome to the New Navy..

apologies.. Normally I would just include a link on his profile.. But If I am writing I am not allowed to use the ships resources for my letter home.

Major Albert Smith, US Army.. West Point Graduate, top of his class.. Artillery, his main degree was in mechanical engineering

When he arrived, The Chief of Staff of the Army had brought him before the Corporal Disciplining of the Commandant of The USMC.

God I hate pen and paper.. I would just embed a link here Grandmaster..

To keep this part short, Smith was supposed to be one of the best of the best the Army had to offer. Captain Colt and SPAWAR would not be getting any of his People for their purposes.. Everyone they had requested, the transfers were denied.. (Four of them were in the brig and NJP's overturned) Captain Colt would be shown what the best of the best was the army had.. Not riff raf they claimed was the best.

Lt. Commander Letch (the honored head of SPAWAR) scolded Captain Colt and told him not to argue.. He got this look on his face and growled something under his breath.. The ACOS laughed and handed Captain Colt the transfer order.. He even pointed out to Colt the President Authorizing Signature, with the Secretary of Defenses signature. Colt growled about Admiral Stone cheating as he signed the authorization. 

"So this is permnant for the next six years.." Colt acted not to happy..

The ACOS laughed and said he was stuck with Smith, and no one could transfer him back.. ( I thought for a second that this was gonna be bad for the officer..)

the Captain turned to Colt and ask, "So he is mine.."

Letch told Colt to go ahead and gloat.. He himself cant believe they tried this and where this stupid..

Andros Walked over to the Major and to everyone's surprise, the Captain picked up the Major in a bear hug.. 

"Those Dumb F#$% Army Brass gave me President Macer's F#$%ing Future Secretary of the Army.." Andros colt put the Major down and gave a little happy dance.. (Again I would normally include a video so the Psychologist could see this..) "We are so gonna kick Admiral Stone's A$$.."

It was nice to see the look on the Smug ACOS face.. It is best described as the look someone gives when they bite into something best described as disgusting..

Letch shook his head like an old man watching a kid learn a hard lesson.

The Captain put his arm around the Major and walked him straight to the bridge.. I did catch the phrase referring to the ships access system is something the Major had pushed for.. (Probably why they sent him out here) a singular command access system for all of the DoD.. Universal and easy to build..

Colt told the watch to get WEPS crap to his rack.. Smith told him thank you but he needs to learn his way around the boat, since all he has is assumptions.. Colt told him that would be for later.. (Colt was like a little kid showing his dad what he had built..) I followed for the next few hours after they left the bridge and Listened as the amazed Major took notes (on the same old pen and paper style) The Major was full of so many questions and did seem to grasp the basics immediately.. ( I first found out my electronic systems did not work right on this boat) Smith had tears in his eyes at the end of the tour.. He gave the Captain a hug and told Colt thank you for lying to the ACOS.. This was everything he had envisioned of a central command cots for the DoD.

Colt looked At Smith and said with a straight face, it was no lie.. this was the end result of his endeavor.. Smith was expected to give Lt. Commander Letch a Briefing in two hours. The XO and third officer would debrief him further.. Master Chief had some filler for him..  Colt had something to take care of.. the Major now could walk the whole boat and do his leadership thing.. (Captain Colt was very excited to have Major Smith.. He shook his hand several times and called them dumb A$$es..) The Captain had tears of joy in his eyes and even was humming The Army goes rolling along as he left..

Major Smith looked at me in my robes and took a deep breath.. (I know the rules but the Major smells good and is a gentleman..) I come to find out he Comes from a long line of Soldiers.. Every war throughout American history in fact.. (Again this damn paper thing) Smith said his grandfather had mentioned an insane PFC Theodore Colt at the battle of Bastiogne during World War Two.. The Major wondered if the two men were related.. Bastard snapped in a good way and managed to attack a german machine gun nest with a knife because he had stabbed another German with his rifle and broke it.. Then the PFC got in an argument with General Patton over a local girl and his Grandfather had to physically restrain the now demoted Private Colt.. (the Private almost decked the General)

(Is this true Grandmaster. The Sailors and soldiers tell such tall tales here.)

I had duties to attend to and thanked the Major for the story.. ( he is very cute..)

Three hours later I am walking to the galley to grab food.. One of the Marines in armor goes flying out of the Galley and hits the wall right in front of me. 

"I prefer not to handle our little discussions this way Boats.. But I will have the men address me as Major.. Or Good Morning, evening, afternoon, but Major always Major.. They have not earned the right to call me sir informally yet. I reserve that for men who have my respect. You all have to earn it. F#$%ing Navy," Major Smith had Master Chief Dimitrious pinned against the wall, hands behind his back with a boot knife to the Boats throat.. ( Boats had his helmet off)

Dimitrious tried to power out of it and almost did.. (I think he is trust..) Major Smith Dropped rolled tossing Boats against the bulk head with a load thud.. the Major stood back up and straightened his Uniform..

I narrowed my eyes and did not mean to sound like a shrew, "Major Smith.."

Boats shook off cobwebs and responded, "Chaps.. The Major was just showing us some of the Army basic combat moves."

Smith narrowed his eyes at Boats, "I will go with that Bulls$%^ for now boats.. The issue we described.."

Dimtirious took a deep breath and told the Major he would fix it immediately to the Major's Satisfaction..

This brings the two points together.. I woke up in the Infirmary with the Major standing over me.. I did something stupid sir.. He said he was going to go have talk with the Captain over his treatment of women in the crew..

Grandmaster.. I am probably screwed, I broke a major naval Tradition.. I Kissed the Major.. (And he kissed me back I think.. He is solid muscle.. Solid Grandmaster.. he smells so good.)

I will probably be sent back immediately for this.. I have decided to keep him..

My apologies for my failure Grandmaster,
Agent Catherine Goodwin

________________________________________________________________________________________________



Bridge of the Rusty Boner

"You know how much headache you have caused me.. I lost another agent because of your crap.." An old man in body Armor growled at the Captain, "I just got her letter Captain Colt.."

"How is my favorite piece of candy doing," Andros was in his own body armor?

A female voice comes over the com, "Robert get your feathers down.. Little Andros has been a prick the whole time.. Jolene is HAPPILY married you dirty old man.. You also need to quit sending us ladies sex toys on our birthday.. My Robert still lays pipe quiet well.." The Female pauses, "You jack a$$ you have us on the ships all com.."

"Ginny.. I am not a gentleman like your pipe layer.." Andros brings up another hologram, "Major Smith.."

The whole Bridge sees a nude Major laying next to a nude chaps, with scratches down his back over whip hits, all tangled up.. "S#$%.. I am going to F#$% you up Colt.."

"We will discuss that points impossibility later.." Andros stands up and takes a deep breath, "Chaps both of you up on your feet.. Now!"

The nude chaplin stands up and then bows her head when she sees the hologram, "I.. Grandmaster. I can explain."

"God D@#$% it  Captain.. Leave the kids alone," The Old man in armor responds.. "You had to make.. "A pause, "My apologies Captain.. I think I see the situation.."

"No need.. Now Major.." Andros addresses the nude Major he walks over to the XO with his hand out. He rubs his fingers indicating money..

"I will pay sir.. Your right.. The skank moved fast," The XO in body Armor shook her head.. "Catherine I bet it would take you three days to get the spit and polish in bed.."

Boats got pissed in his response, "I thought Third would bag her first.. F#$% there went a grand.."

"F#$% you boats," The third officer shook his head.. "I will take the watch per the bet Captain.. 24 hour God D@#$ watch.."

"You SOBs bet I would," The Major gets very angry completely nude..

"I see why she likes him," The XO gets a dirty smile on her face.. "Damn Catherine.. I see why you moved fast."

"I bet on true love and it took less then two days," Andros looked back at the Major.. "I heard you proposed to her by chance.. It would save me an officers Rack. Boats loves having more space to store s#$%."

"Catherine my dear.. Grab My body armor.. Me and the Captain need to talk over his open door Policy, "The Major unhappily growls..

Hatchett whispers, "Catherine the ring is in the top drawer.. Next to his grandfather's metals box."

the Major goes wide eyed as Catherine moved like lightening. She opens the drawer and takes out a small box.. In tears she opens the box and takes out an old ring.. "Its.. Its beautiful.."

"I.." Major Smith freezes, "I was thinking about it.. But.. She is a member of the crew and it means the end of one of us serving on this Boat.. "

"I quit," Catherine bites her bottom lip.. "You are not getting out of this Major.."

"Unacceptable," Colt growls out.. "It is time we add this level of difficulty to the crew.. Personal relationships as outlined per the new UCMJ. You have all avoided it.. " andros activates the Com system, "Mrs. Smith.. This is Captain Colt.."

"Hello dearie.." An Old woman leans forward, "Did that stupid son of mine fall for it.."

"Mama," Major Smith pauses.. "You.."

An old man appears on the Holograms and sees his son nude.. "I see Captain Colt what you meant. she is very attractive.."

"Major General Smith," Andros responds politely.. "I told you I could handle this.. He is almost tied down.. But he is trying to get away.."

"Son.. You are in a relationship with a fellow officer on board the vessel," The Major General sounded all official..

"Go to hell dad.. Mom was your commanding officer when she got pregnant with my older sister.. Do not even try that crap with me," Major Smith growled at his dad as the Crew decided it was to go about their duties.

"You must be the Smiths," Ginny's voice cut in.. "Your son has deflowered our baby girl.. It devalues her dowery.."

Catherine got a little wide eyed as she heard Mrs. Smith and Ginny negotiating a dowery. cattle and land were mentioned..

"I still out rank you son.. " The MAjor General responded.. "I am not sure this woman is good enough for my blood line.. I want little grandbabies able to serve in my beloved Army.. Not spies and liberal weak minded.."

"I heard through the grapevine Dad.. I grow up to be the Secretary of the Army.. Means I will eventually out rank you," Major Smith Defiantly responds.. "So F#$% off.."

Ginny gets loud at the comment, "That is the wrong question.. Your son is not very smart.. Our little Catherine is the sixth smartest person on the planet.. We do not want Army dumb little brats for future agents.."

The whole conversation devolves into insults as Captain Colt sits down in his command chair..

Quietly the Grandmaster sits down and waits like the Captain..

After a few minutes Catherine breaks down into different tears and puts the ring back in the box..

"Oh hell F#$^ing no," Major Smith still nude gets angry.. "You keep that damn ring.. It was Grammy's and F#$% them all. I will F#$%ing marry who I want.. I am NOT my fathers Soldier.. I am my own man.."

Defiantly Catherine stands up completely nude, "Will you be my husband and smash spiders.. I hate f#$%ing spiders.."

"With the biggest Artillery I can find," Major Smith kisses Catherine.. "Or my shoe which ever is closer.. Will you help shut these F#$%ers out so we can get some sleep before my watch.."

Still nude she walks over to the wall, "Hand me my tools.. It will take about a second.. As for sleep.. Mister you might have time to scrub my back in our shower.. My apologies Captain but I am invoking Privacy.."

"What do you two think your doing," The Major General Responds coldly..

"Agent Catherine," The old Grandmaster calls out..

A few seconds later the line goes out with The Major's and Chaplins hologram on it.

"All clear we have been locked out," Colt smiles evilly.. "Not a single person here may say S#$%.. I am classifying this Eyes only no gossip or yesterday will have been a cake walk.."

The ones arguing break down laughing..

"I knew you were up to something but," The XO looks at all the old people laughing.. "Yall are evil bastards.. Reverse Psychology.."

"Pigs to mud.. My son is a stubborn a#$.Out of a personal Curosity," Major General Smith paused.. "My dad served with a private Colt.. Saved his A$$ hundreds of times at Bastogne dad said.. Worst disciplined soldier he ever served with.. Tried to get into a fight with old Blood and guts.."

"He married the girl Major General.. She was my Grandmother," Andros grinned.. "Some day we will have to sit down and exchange our family bulls#$% stories.."

"Small D@#$ world Colt. A long line of BATS#$% men. Speaking of history.. " The Major General Grinned,"And for the Record.." He kisses his wife, "We were F#$%ing long before she got Pregnant.." The Major General Squeezes her butte as he gropes her.. "Lt. Colonel.."

Mrs. smith Slaps the Major General, "You are so bad First Lt. Smith So bad." She kisses her husband back, "We will see you at the Wedding if any of us get invited.." Mrs. Smith cuts the communication as she say, "I see our soldier is standing at.."

The old Grandmaster smiles as he takes a deep breath as he stands and walks around the bridge, "So much has changed.. Captain.. You are a good man.. You seem to be cut from a different set of cloth.. Our little Catherine.. I am not happy about her getting lashes, But I understand.. " the hologram looks at the crew, "You took the bottom of the barrel and found gold.." After a few moments, "Private conversation Captain.."

The Captain cuts the line as he talks with the old man privately..

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